Random Stories
by ruthieelz
Summary: My collection of different random stories. Puppyshipping; Prideshipping; other pairings if requested.Warning: Extreme sarcasm, OOC, and randomness are in these stories. Rated T for some language and a female Yami.    Now with a couple of Yugioh GX stories!
1. Puppyshipping

**A/N: Here's a new story. Dedicated to my lovely boyfriend, Seth Casey. Love you babe. There will be other chapters in this story, not sure how many though. I will take requests on a new pairing. Enjoy. **

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><p>"Ugh, I am so tired", Seto Kaiba said. It was a long day, and Seto was tired. He needed his puppy to help relax him. "Puppy, are you home?" Joey walked down the stairs and saw Seto. "Seto, you need some dinner. Luckily for you, I have some made for you with your coffee. Come eat." Joey said. Seto went to go eat.<p>

A few hours later, Joey and Seto were laying in bed, after making love for three hours. "Seto, good night." "Night Joey." They went to bed and Seto started to dream.

~Begin dream~

_It all started when our hero, Seto Kaiba, woke up in a swamp. It was the ninth time it had happened. Feeling alarmingly displeased, Seto Kaiba poked a salt shaker, thinking it would make him feel better (but as usual, it did not). Without warning, he realized that his beloved a ring was missing! Immediately he called his acquaintance, Joey Wheeler. Seto Kaiba had known Joey Wheeler for 4 years, the majority of which were flamboyant ones. Joey Wheeler was unique. He was clever though sometimes a little... annoying. Seto Kaiba called him anyway, for the situation was urgent._

_Joey Wheeler picked up to a very happy Seto Kaiba. Joey Wheeler calmly assured him that most otters panic before mating, yet otters usually exotically belch *after* mating. He had no idea what that meant; he was only concerned with distracting Seto Kaiba. Why was Joey Wheeler trying to distract Seto Kaiba? Because he had snuck out from Seto Kaiba's with the ring only eight days prior. It was a striking little a ring... how could he resist?_

_It didn't take long before Seto Kaiba got back to the subject at hand: a ring. Joey Wheeler cringed. Reluctantly, Joey Wheeler invited him over; assuring him they'd find the ring. Seto Kaiba grabbed his hibachi and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, Joey Wheeler realized that he was in trouble. He had to find a place to hide the ring and he had to do it deftly. He figured that if Seto Kaiba took the Daewoo, he had taken at least two minutes before Seto Kaiba would get there. But if he took the Blue Eyes White Dragon jet? Then Joey Wheeler would be abnormally screwed._

_Before he could come up with any reasonable ideas, Joey Wheeler was interrupted by ten clueless Red Eyes Black Dragons that were lured by his a ring. Joey Wheeler yawned; 'Not again', he thought. Feeling worried, he skillfully reached for his salt shaker and recklessly poked every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent-the discouraged critters began to scurry back toward the thicket, squealing with discontent. He exhaled with relief. That's when he heard the Blue Eyes White Dragon jet rolling up. It was Seto Kaiba._

_-o0o-_

_As he pulled up, he felt a sense of urgency. He had had to make an unscheduled stop at The Salvation Army to pick up a 12-pack of forks, so he knew he was running late. With a quick leap, Seto Kaiba was out of the Blue Eyes White Dragon jet and went earnestly jaunting toward Joey Wheeler's front door. Meanwhile inside, Joey Wheeler was panicking. Not thinking, he tossed the ring into a box of staplers and then slid the box behind his grandfather clock. Joey Wheeler was angered but at least the ring was concealed. The doorbell rang._

_'Come in,' Joey Wheeler flamboyantly purred. With a hasty push, Seto Kaiba opened the door. 'Sorry for being late, but I was being chased by some stupid jerk in a truck,' he lied. 'Its fine,' Joey Wheeler assured him. Seto Kaiba took a seat just under where Joey Wheeler had hidden the ring. Joey Wheeler grimaced trying unsuccessfully to hide his nervousness. 'Uhh, can I get you anything?' he blurted. But Seto Kaiba was distracted. All of a sudden, Joey Wheeler noticed an oafish look on Seto Kaiba's face. Seto Kaiba slowly opened his mouth to speak._

_'...What's that smell?'_

_Joey Wheeler felt a stabbing pain in his arm when Seto Kaiba asked this. In a moment of disbelief, he realized that he had hidden the ring right by his oscillating fan. 'WH-what? I don't smell anything..!' A lie. An insensitive look started to form on Seto Kaiba's face. He turned to notice a box that seemed clearly out of place. 'Th-th-those are just my grandma's mittens from when she used to have pet bunnies. She, uh...dropped 'em by here earlier'. Seto Kaiba nodded with fake acknowledgement...then, before Joey Wheeler could react, Seto Kaiba thoughtfully lunged toward the box and opened it. The ring was plainly in view._

_Seto Kaiba stared at Joey Wheeler for what must've been eight minutes. Rather abruptly, Joey Wheeler groped indiscriminately in Seto Kaiba's direction, clearly desperate. Seto Kaiba grabbed the ring and bolted for the door. It was locked. Joey Wheeler let out an enchanting chuckle. 'If only you hadn't been so protective of that thing, none of this would have happened, Seto Kaiba,' he rebuked. Joey Wheeler always had been a little stupid, so Seto Kaiba knew that reconciliation was not an option; he needed to escape before Joey Wheeler did something crazy, like... start chucking paper clips at him or something. Without warning, he gripped his ring tightly and made a dash toward the window, diving headlong through the glass panels._

_Joey Wheeler looked on, blankly. 'What the hell? That seemed excessive. The other door was open, you know.' Silence from Seto Kaiba. 'And to think, I varnished that window frame six days ago...it never ends!' Suddenly he felt a tinge of concern for Seto Kaiba. 'Oh. You...okay?' Still silence. Joey Wheeler walked over to the window and looked down. Seto Kaiba was gone._

_-o0o-_

_Just yonder, Seto Kaiba was struggling to make his way through the cornfield behind Joey Wheeler's place. Seto Kaiba had severely hurt his foot during the window incident, and was starting to lose strength. Another pack of feral Red Eyes Black Dragons suddenly appeared, having caught wind of the ring. One by one they latched on to Seto Kaiba. Already weakened from his injury, Seto Kaiba yielded to the furry onslaught and collapsed. The last thing he saw before losing consciousness was a buzzing horde of Red Eyes Black Dragons running off with his a ring._

_But then God came down with His congenial smile and restored Seto Kaiba's a ring. Feeling worried, God smote the Red Eyes Black Dragons for their injustice. Then he got in His Daewoo and zipped away with the fortitude of 11,000 otters running from an enlarged pack of otters. Seto Kaiba tripped with joy when he saw this. His ring was safe. It was a good thing, too, because in three minutes his favorite TV show, Teen Wolf, was going to come on (followed immediately by 'When koalas meet pipe bomb'). Seto Kaiba was excited. And so, everyone except Joey Wheeler and a few bloody glove-toting puppies lived blissfully happy, forever after._

~End Dream~

Seto woke up screaming, in the process, waking up Joey. Joey just sat up, staring at Seto. It was four in the morning and Joey was worried.

"Seto, are you ok? You look sick."

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just had a strange ass dream where we had to go save a ring and you got killed and everyone called us by our full names. It was horrible, Puppy." Joey just stared at Seto. "That's it Dragon, no more coffee for you for dinner. The coffee is making your dreams crazy." With that, Joey grabbed Seto by his shirt and kissed him. They spent the rest of the night making love to each other.

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><p><strong>AN: And so this chapter ends. Chapter 2 will be up shortly. Review please. But be nice. **


	2. Prideshipping

**A/N: Here's a new chapter of Random Stories. I still will take requests on a new pairing for each chapter. **Warning: Extreme sarcasm, OOC, and randomness are in this chapter. Prideshipping, and a female Yami. Enjoy.****

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><p>It all started when our uber geek, Seto, woke up in a foxy forest. It was the seventh time it had happened. Feeling alarmingly concerned, Seto groped a gerbil, thinking it would make him feel better (but as usual, it did not). Absolutely thrilled, he realized that his beloved diary was missing! Immediately he called his undeclared soulmate, Yami. Seto had known Yami for (plus or minus) 1.2 billion years, the majority of which were enticing ones. Yami was unique. She was attractive though sometimes a little... annoying. Seto called her anyway, for the situation was urgent.<p>

Yami picked up to a very angry Seto. Yami calmly assured him that most man-eating capybaras shudder before mating, yet legless puppies usually surreptitiously sneeze *after* mating. She had no idea what that meant; she was only concerned with distracting Seto. Why was Yami trying to distract Seto? Because she had snuck out from Seto's with the diary only four days prior. It was a saucy little diary... how could she resist?

It didn't take long before Seto got back to the subject at hand: his diary. Yami sighed. Relunctantly, Yami invited him over, assuring him they'd find the diary. Seto grabbed his rhinocerus and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, Yami realized that she was in trouble. She had to find a place to hide the diary and she had to do it recklessly. She figured that if Seto took the curb-jumping ghetto sled (Impala), she had take at least four minutes before Seto would get there. But if he took the time machine? Then Yami would be scarcely screwed.

Before she could come up with any reasonable ideas, Yami was interrupted by five pestering dogs that were lured by her diary. Yami grimaced; 'Not again', she thought. Feeling exasperated, she aimlessly reached for her dull pencil and aimlessly backhanded every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent-the discouraged critters began to scurry back toward the disease-infested jungle, squealing with discontent. She exhaled with relief. That's when she heard the time machine rolling up. It was Seto.

-o0o-

As he pulled up, he felt a sense of urgency. He had had to make an unscheduled stop at McDonald's to pick up a 12-pack of wolverines, so he knew he was running late. With a mighty leap, Seto was out of the time machine and went flamboyantly jaunting toward Yami's front door. Meanwhile inside, Yami was panicking. Not thinking, she tossed the diary into a box of wolverines and then slid the box behind her elephant. Yami was displeased but at least the diary was concealed. The doorbell rang.

'Come in,' Yami scandalously purred. With a heroic push, Seto opened the door. 'Sorry for being late, but I was being chased by some clueless social outcast in a pimp fresh, candy-painted 'Lac,' he lied. 'It's fine,' Yami assured him. Seto took a seat just perfectly far from where Yami had hidden the diary. Yami turned red trying unsuccessfully to hide her nervousness. 'Uhh, can I get you anything?' she blurted. But Seto was distracted. Duly ecstatic about the looming crises, Yami noticed a insensitive look on Seto's face. Seto slowly opened his mouth to speak.

'...What's that smell?'

Yami felt a stabbing pain in her ear when Seto asked this. In a moment of disbelief, she realized that she had hidden the diary right by her oscillating fan. 'Wh-what? I don't smell anything..!' A lie. A dimwitted look started to form on Seto's face. He turned to notice a box that seemed clearly out of place. 'Th-th-those are just my grandma's ninja stars from when she used to have pet disease-carrying chipmunks. She, uh...dropped 'em by here earlier'. Seto nodded with fake acknowledgement...then, before Yami could react, Seto aimlessly lunged toward the box and opened it. The diary was plainly in view.

Seto stared at Yami for what what must've been five millseconds. In a tragically predictable turn of events, Yami groped surreptitiously in Seto's direction, clearly desperate. Seto grabbed the diary and bolted for the door. It was locked. Yami let out a sassy chuckle. 'If only you hadn't been so protective of that thing, none of this would have happened, Seto,' she rebuked. Yami always had been a little annoying, so Seto knew that reconciliation was not an option; he needed to escape before Yami did something crazy, like... start chucking ninja stars at her or something. A few freaknasty minutes later, he gripped his diary tightly and made a dash toward the window, diving headlong through the glass panels.

Yami looked on, blankly. 'What the hell? That seemed excessive. The other door was open, you know.' Silence from Seto. 'And to think, I varnished that window frame four days ago...it never ends!' Suddenly she felt a tinge of concern for Seto. 'Oh. You ..okay?' Still silence. Yami walked over to the window and looked down. Seto was gone.

-o0o-

Just yonder, Seto was struggling to make his way through the lemur-infested moor behind Yami's place. Seto had severely hurt his taint during the window incident, and was starting to lose strength. Another pack of feral dogs suddenly appeared, having caught wind of the diary. One by one they latched on to Seto. Already weakened from his injury, Seto yielded to the furry onslaught and collapsed. The last thing he saw before losing consciousness was a buzzing horde of dogs running off with his diary.

But then God came down with His smart smile and restored Seto's diary. Feeling relieved, God smote the dogs for their injustice. Then He got in His pimp fresh, candy-painted 'Lac and jetted away with the fortitude of half a million venomous koalas running from a bloated pack of long-haired sea monkeys. Seto skipped with joy when he saw this.

His diary was safe. It was a good thing, too, because in seven minutes his favorite TV show, Lizzie McGuire, was going to come on (followed immediately by 'When South American hissing sloths meet bloody glove'). Seto was pleased. And so, everyone except Yami and a few ebola-toting Indonesian devil cats lived blissfully happy, forever after.

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><p><strong>AN: And so this chapter ends. Chapter 3 will be up shortly. Review please. But be nice.**


	3. Castleshipping

**A/N: Here's chapter 3 of Random Stories. This is Castleshipping which is Seth, Seto and Jounouchi. Enjoy. This is for Nagareboshi-Lover. Hope you like it. As usual, I own nothing but the crazy plot. And yeah, the chapter is short, but that's the way I write my stories. :)**

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><p>It all started when our hyphen-happy protagonist, Seth, woke up in a fanstic pumpkin patch. It was the seventh time it had happened. Feeling abundantly puzzled, Seth poked a carrot, thinking it would make him feel better (but as usual, it did not). Happy as a frickin' monkey, he realized that his beloved diary was missing! Immediately he called his bed-friend, Jou and Seto. Seth had known Jou and Seto for (plus or minus) 1.2 billion years, the majority of which were curious ones. Jou and Seto was unique. He was attractive though sometimes a little... stupid. Seth called him anyway, for the situation was urgent.<p>

Jou and Seto picked up a very glad Seth. Jou and Seto calmly assured him that most spotted wolf hamsters sigh before mating, yet man-eating capybaras usually indiscriminately shudder *after* mating. He had no idea what that meant; he was only concerned with distracting Seth. Why was Jou and Seto trying to distract Seth? Because he had snuck out from Seth's with the diary only five days prior. It was a electric little diary... how could he resist?

It didn't take long before Seth got back to the subject at hand: his diary. Jou and Seto turned red. Relunctantly, Jou and Seto invited him over, assuring him they'd find the diary. Seth grabbed his time machine and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, Jou and Seto realized that he was in trouble. He had to find a place to hide the diary and he had to do it aimlessly. He figured that if Seth took the tricycle, he had take at least eleven minutes before Seth would get there. But if he took the Kaibamobile? Then Jou and Seto would be abnormally screwed.

Before he could come up with any reasonable ideas, Jou and Seto were interrupted by nine stupid Care Bears that were lured by his diary. Jou and Seto panicked; 'Not again', they thought. Feeling pleased, they recklessly reached for his gerbil and fearlessly backhanded every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent-the discouraged critters began to scurry back toward the magical cornfield, squealing with discontent. He exhaled with relief. That's when he heard the Kaibamobile rolling up. It was Seth.

-o0o-

As he pulled up, he felt a sense of urgency. He had had to make an unscheduled stop at Wal-Mart to pick up a 12-pack of live hand grenades, so he knew he was running late. With a careful leap, Seth was out of the Kaibamobile and went sassily jaunting toward Jou and Seto's front door. Meanwhile inside, Jou and Seto were panicking. Not thinking, he tossed the diary into a box of gerbils and then slid the box behind his canoe. Jou and Seto were pleased but at least the diary was concealed. The doorbell rang.

'Come in,' Jou and Seto flamboyantly purred. With a heroic push, Seth opened the door. 'Sorry for being late, but I was being chased by some dimwitted rationality-deprived retard in a time machine,' he lied. 'It's fine,' Jou and Seto assured him. Seth took a seat exotically proximate to where Jou and Seto had hidden the diary. Jou and Seto yawned trying unsuccessfully to hide his nervousness. 'Uhh, can I get you anything?' he blurted. But Seth was distracted. Unaware of the bleakness of existence, Jou and Seto noticed a pestering look on Seth's face. Seth slowly opened his mouth to speak.

'...Where's my diary?'

Jou and Seto felt a stabbing pain in his kidney when Seth asked this. In a moment of disbelief, he realized that he had hidden the diary right by his oscillating fan. 'Wh-what? I don't smell anything..!' A lie. A dimwitted look started to form on Seth's face. He turned to notice a box that seemed clearly out of place. 'Th-th-those are just my grandma's ninja stars from when she used to have pet spotted wolf hamsters. She, uh...dropped 'em by here earlier'. Seth nodded with fake acknowledgement...then, before Jou and Seto could react, Seth aptly lunged toward the box and opened it. The diary was plainly in view.

Seth stared at Jou and Seto for what what must've been eight minutes. Giggling like schoolgirl, Jou and Seto groped explosively in Seth's direction, clearly desperate. Seth grabbed the diary and bolted for the door. It was locked. Jou and Seto let out a striking chuckle. 'If only you hadn't been so protective of that thing, none of this would have happened, Seth,' he rebuked. Jou and Seto always had been a little insensitive, so Seth knew that reconciliation was not an option; he needed to escape before Jou and Seto did something crazy, like... start chucking dull pencils at him or something. Suddenly cheered up by the Hamtaro theme song, he gripped his diary tightly and made a dash toward the window, diving headlong through the glass panels.

Jou and Seto looked on, blankly. 'What the hell? That seemed excessive. The other door was open, you know.' Silence from Seth. 'And to think, I varnished that window frame seven days ago...it never ends!' Suddenly he felt a tinge of concern for Seth. 'Oh. You ..okay?' Still silence. Jou and Seto walked over to the window and looked down. Seth was gone.

-o0o-

Away from the nonsense, Seth was struggling to make his way through the lemur-infested moor behind Jou and Seto's place. Seth had severely hurt his armpit during the window incident, and was starting to lose strength. Another pack of feral Care Bears suddenly appeared, having caught wind of the diary. One by one they latched on to Seth. Already weakened from his injury, Seth yielded to the furry onslaught and collapsed. The last thing he saw before losing consciousness was a buzzing horde of Care Bears running off with his diary.

But then God came down with His plucky smile and restored Seth's diary. Feeling puzzled, God smote the Care Bears for their injustice. Then He got in His amphibious vehicle and bolted away with the fortitude of half a million long-haired sea monkeys running from a little pack of 3-legged wallabies. Seth jumped with joy when he saw this. His diary was safe. It was a good thing, too, because in five minutes his favorite TV show, American Idol, was going to come on (followed immediately by 'When 3-legged wallabies meet gun'). Seth was relieved. And so, everyone except Jou and Seto and a few rusty razor blade-toting disease-carrying chipmunks lived blissfully happy, forever after.

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><p><strong>AN: I've got chapter 4 already written, so it will be up after this one. Still taking requests for parings here folks. **


	4. Kingcrabshipping

**A/N: Hey everyone, here's chapter 4. Made right after chapter 3. Enjoy. And yeah, this is a Yugioh 5ds pairing. But this is the only 5d's pairing, so I'm not gonna change the category either. **

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><p>It all started when our hyphen-happy protagonist, Yusei, woke up in a fantastic pumpkin patch. It was the second time it had happened. Feeling abnormally stunned, Yusei hit a gerbil, thinking it would make him feel better (but as usual, it did not). Ever so extemperaneously, he realized that his beloved Yugioh card was missing! Immediately he called his parole officer, Jack. Yusei had known Jack for (plus or minus) 1.2 billion years, the majority of which were enchanting ones. Jack was unique. He was charismatic though sometimes a little... annoying. Yusei called him anyway, for the situation was urgent.<p>

Jack picked up a very happy Yusei. Jack calmly assured him that most man-eating capybaras sigh before mating, yet albino cats usually surreptitiously sigh *after* mating. He had no idea what that meant; he was only concerned with distracting Yusei. Why was Jack trying to distract Yusei? Because he had snuck out from Yusei's with the Yugioh card only five days prior. It was a striking little Yugioh card... how could he resist?

It didn't take long before Yusei got back to the subject at hand: his Yugioh card. Jack shuddered. Relunctantly, Jack invited him over, assuring him they'd find the Yugioh card. Yusei grabbed his refrigerator and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, Jack realized that he was in trouble. He had to find a place to hide the Yugioh card and he had to do it aggressively. He figured that if Yusei took the tricked out go kart, he had take at least five minutes before Yusei would get there. But if he took the Dragon? Then Jack would be exceedingly screwed.

Before he could come up with any reasonable ideas, Jack was interrupted by five funny-smelling catss that were lured by his Yugioh card. Jack yawned; 'Not again', he thought. Feeling pleased, he randomly reached for his dull pencil and skillfully punched every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent-the discouraged critters began to scurry back toward the disease-infested jungle, squealing with discontent. He exhaled with relief. That's when he heard the Dragon rolling up. It was Yusei.

-o0o-

As he pulled up, he felt a sense of urgency. He had had to make an unscheduled stop at The Salvation Army to pick up a 12-pack of potatos, so he knew he was running late. With a deft leap, Yusei was out of the Dragon and went sassily jaunting toward Jack's front door. Meanwhile inside, Jack was panicking. Not thinking, he tossed the Yugioh card into a box of ninja stars and then slid the box behind his hammock. Jack was concerned but at least the Yugioh card was concealed. The doorbell rang.

'Come in,' Jack exotically purred. With a hasty push, Yusei opened the door. 'Sorry for being late, but I was being chased by some abrasive noble genius in a time machine,' he lied. 'It's fine,' Jack assured him. Yusei took a seat ridiculously far from where Jack had hidden the Yugioh card. Jack yawned trying unsuccessfully to hide his nervousness. 'Uhh, can I get you anything?' he blurted. But Yusei was distracted. Ever so extemperaneously, Jack noticed a selfish look on Yusei's face. Yusei slowly opened his mouth to speak.

'...What's that smell?'

Jack felt a stabbing pain in his fingernail when Yusei asked this. In a moment of disbelief, he realized that he had hidden the Yugioh card right by his oscillating fan. 'Wh-what? I don't smell anything..!' A lie. A dimwitted look started to form on Yusei's face. He turned to notice a box that seemed clearly out of place. 'Th-th-those are just my grandma's potatos from when she used to have pet long-haired sea monkeys. She, uh...dropped 'em by here earlier'. Yusei nodded with fake acknowledgement...then, before Jack could react, Yusei recklessly lunged toward the box and opened it. The Yugioh card was plainly in view.

Yusei stared at Jack for what what must've been eight hours. Heart filled with earnest fortitude, Jack groped indiscriminately in Yusei's direction, clearly desperate. Yusei grabbed the Yugioh card and bolted for the door. It was locked. Jack let out a saucy chuckle. 'If only you hadn't been so protective of that thing, none of this would have happened, Yusei,' he rebuked. Jack always had been a little stupid, so Yusei knew that reconciliation was not an option; he needed to escape before Jack did something crazy, like... start chucking ripened avocados at him or something. Suddenly cheered up by the Hamtaro theme song, he gripped his Yugioh card tightly and made a dash toward the window, diving headlong through the glass panels.

Jack looked on, blankly. 'What the hell? That seemed excessive. The other door was open, you know.' Silence from Yusei. 'And to think, I varnished that window frame eleven days ago...it never ends!' Suddenly he felt a tinge of concern for Yusei. 'Oh. You ..okay?' Still silence. Jack walked over to the window and looked down. Yusei was gone.

-o0o-

Just yonder, Yusei was struggling to make his way through the foxy forest behind Jack's place. Yusei had severely hurt his scalp during the window incident, and was starting to lose strength. Another pack of feral catss suddenly appeared, having caught wind of the Yugioh card. One by one they latched on to Yusei. Already weakened from his injury, Yusei yielded to the furry onslaught and collapsed. The last thing he saw before losing consciousness was a buzzing horde of catss running off with his Yugioh card.

About two hours later, Yusei awoke, his ear throbbing. It was dark and Yusei did not know where he was. Deep in the hazy secret vineyard, Yusei was exceedingly lost. Heart filled with earnest fortitude, he remembered that his Yugioh card was taken by the catss. But at that point, he was just thankful for his life. That's when, to his horror, a enormous cats emerged from the foxy forest. It was the alpha cats. Yusei opened his mouth to scream but was cut short when the cats sunk its teeth into Yusei's shin. With a faint groan, the life escaped from Yusei's lungs, but not before he realized that he was a failure.

Less than ten miles away, Jack was entombed by anguish over the loss of the Yugioh card. 'MY PRECIOUS!' he cried, as he reached for a sharpened carrot. With a apt thrust, he buried it deeply into his double chin. As the room began to fade to black, he thought about Yusei... wishing he had found the courage to tell him that he loved him. But he would die alone that day. All that remained was the Yugioh card that had turned them against each other, ultimately causing their demise. And as the dew on melancholy sappling branches began to reflect the dawn's reddish glare, all that could be heard was the chilling cry of distant catss, desecrating all things sacred to virtuous men, and perpetuating an evil that would reign for centuries to come. Our heroes would've lived unhappily ever after, but they were too busy being dead. So, no one lived forever after, the end.

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><p><strong>AN: The next pairing will be random. **


	5. Stoicshipping

**Here's a new chapter of Random Stories. This time, it's Stoicshipping(Seto and Priest Seth). Enjoy.**

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><p>It all started when our hyphen-happy protagonist, Seto, woke up in a swamp. It was the seventh time it had happened. Feeling excessively angered, Seto stroked a gerbil, thinking it would make him feel better (but as usual, it did not). Before the all-seeing eyes of a perpetually displeased diety, he realized that his beloved Millennium Rod was missing! Immediately he called his least favorite Egyptian, Seth. Seto had known Seth for at least 3 years, the majority of which were curious ones. Seth was unique. He was outgoing though sometimes a little... insensitive. Seto called him anyway, for the situation was urgent.<p>

Seth picked up to a very mad Seto. Seth calmly assured him that most disease-carrying chipmunks shudder before mating, yet spotted wolf hamsters usually charismatically panic *after* mating. He had no idea what that meant; he was only concerned with distracting Seto. Why was Seth trying to distract Seto? Because he had snuck out from Seto's with the Millennium Rod only eleven days prior. It was a enticing little Millennium Rod... how could he resist?

It didn't take long before Seto got back to the subject at hand: his Millennium Rod. Seth sneezed. Relunctantly, Seth invited him over, assuring him they'd find the Millennium Rod. Seto grabbed his hammock and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, Seth realized that he was in trouble. He had to find a place to hide the Millennium Rod and he had to do it aggressively. He figured that if Seto took the Jap Trap, he had take at least eleven minutes before Seto would get there. But if he took the ferrari? Then Seth would be abundantly screwed.

Before he could come up with any reasonable ideas, Seth was interrupted by ten oafish Kuribohs that were lured by his Millennium Rod. Seth panicked; 'Not again', he thought. Feeling angered, he aimlessly reached for his dull pencil and aimlessly groped every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent-the discouraged critters began to scurry back toward the lemur-infested moor, squealing with discontent. He exhaled with relief. That's when he heard the ferrari rolling up. It was Seto.

-o0o-

As he pulled up, he felt a sense of urgency. He had had to make an unscheduled stop at McDonald's to pick up a 12-pack of large french fries, so he knew he was running late. With a mighty leap, Seto was out of the ferrari and went earnestly jaunting toward Seth's front door. Meanwhile inside, Seth was panicking. Not thinking, he tossed the Millennium Rod into a box of gerbils and then slid the box behind his George Foreman grill. Seth was pleased but at least the Millennium Rod was concealed. The doorbell rang.

'Come in,' Seth explosively purred. With a skillful push, Seto opened the door. 'Sorry for being late, but I was being chased by some clueless beer-sloshed tool in a homemade car,' he lied. 'It's fine,' Seth assured him. Seto took a seat conveniently far from where Seth had hidden the Millennium Rod. Seth cringed trying unsuccessfully to hide his nervousness. 'Uhh, can I get you anything?' he blurted. But Seto was distracted. A few freaknasty minutes later, Seth noticed a dimwitted look on Seto's face. Seto slowly opened his mouth to speak.

'...What's that smell?'

Seth felt a stabbing pain in his prostate when Seto asked this. In a moment of disbelief, he realized that he had hidden the Millennium Rod right by his oscillating fan. 'Wh-what? I don't smell anything..!' A lie. A annoying look started to form on Seto's face. He turned to notice a box that seemed clearly out of place. 'Th-th-those are just my grandma's bananas from when she used to have pet South American hissing sloths. She, uh...dropped 'em by here earlier'. Seto nodded with fake acknowledgement...then, before Seth could react, Seto thoughtfully lunged toward the box and opened it. The Millennium Rod was plainly in view.

Seto stared at Seth for what what must've been seven millseconds. Giggling like schoolgirl, Seth groped exotically in Seto's direction, clearly desperate. Seto grabbed the Millennium Rod and bolted for the door. It was locked. Seth let out a striking chuckle. 'If only you hadn't been so protective of that thing, none of this would have happened, Seto,' he rebuked. Seth always had been a little dimwitted, so Seto knew that reconciliation was not an option; he needed to escape before Seth did something crazy, like... start chucking dull pencils at him or something. Unaware of the bleakness of existence, he gripped his Millennium Rod tightly and made a dash toward the window, diving headlong through the glass panels.

Seth looked on, blankly. 'What the hell? That seemed excessive. The other door was open, you know.' Silence from Seto. 'And to think, I varnished that window frame three days ago...it never ends!' Suddenly he felt a tinge of concern for Seto. 'Oh. You ..okay?' Still silence. Seth walked over to the window and looked down. Seto was gone.

-o0o-

Just yonder, Seto was struggling to make his way through the imaginery desert behind Seth's place. Seto had severely hurt his kidney during the window incident, and was starting to lose strength. Another pack of feral Kuribohs suddenly appeared, having caught wind of the Millennium Rod. One by one they latched on to Seto. Already weakened from his injury, Seto yielded to the furry onslaught and collapsed. The last thing he saw before losing consciousness was a buzzing horde of Kuribohs running off with his Millennium Rod.

About nine hours later, Seto awoke, his love handle throbbing. It was dark and Seto did not know where he was. Deep in the enchanting secret vineyard, Seto was really lost. In a blinding moment of misguided bravado, he remembered that his Millennium Rod was taken by the Kuribohs. But at that point, he was just thankful for his life. That's when, to his horror, a shrunken Kuriboh emerged from the haunted thicket. It was the alpha Kuriboh. Seto opened his mouth to scream but was cut short when the Kuriboh sunk its teeth into Seto's ear. With a faint groan, the life escaped from Seto's lungs, but not before he realized that he was a failure.

Less than eleven miles away, Seth was entombed by anguish over the loss of the Millennium Rod. 'MY PRECIOUS!' he cried, as he reached for a sharpened banana. With a inept thrust, he buried it deeply into his kidney. As the room began to fade to black, he thought about Seto... wishing he had found the courage to tell him that he loved him. But he would die alone that day. All that remained was the Millennium Rod that had turned them against each other, ultimately causing their demise. And as the dew on melancholy sappling branches began to reflect the dawn's reddish glare, all that could be heard was the chilling cry of distant Kuribohs, desecrating all things sacred to virtuous men, and perpetuating an evil that would reign for centuries to come. Our heroes would've lived unhappily ever after, but they were too busy being dead. So, no one lived forever after, the end. :'(


	6. Darkshipping

**This is Chapter 6. It's Darkshipping. For Kyo's 1 lover. Enjoy! I hope you like it.**

It all started when our antagonizing protagonist,Yami Bakura, woke up in a pool. It was the tenth time it had happened. Feeling very concerned, Bakura backhanded a ripened avocado, thinking it would make him feel better (but as usual, it did not). Happy as a frickin' monkey, he realized that his beloved Winged Kuriboh was missing! Immediately he called his favorite Mormon, Yami Yugi . Bakura had known Yami for 6years, the majority of which were sassy ones. Yami was unique. He was attractive though sometimes a little... selfish. Bakura called him anyway, for the situation was urgent.

Yami picked up to a very pissed off Bakura. Yami calmly assured him that most Indonesian devil cats bitch before mating, yet albino cats usually explosively yawn after mating. He had no idea what that meant; he was only concerned with distracting Bakura. Why was Yami trying to distract Bakura? Because he had snuck out from Bakura's with the Winged Kuriboh only six days prior. It was a sassy little Winged Kuriboh... how could he resist?

It didn't take long before Bakura got back to the subject at hand: his Winged Kuriboh. Yami shuddered. Relunctantly, Yami invited him over,assuring him they'd find the Winged Kuriboh. Bakura grabbed his hippopotamus and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, Yami realized that he was in trouble. He had to find a place to hide the Winged Kuriboh and he had to do it deftly. He figured that if Bakura took the homemade car, he had take at least ten minutes before Bakura would get there. But if he took the Ferrari? Then Yami would be scarcely screwed.

Before he could come up with any reasonable ideas, Yami was interrupted by two selfish dragons that were lured by his Winged Kuriboh. Yami belched; 'Not again', he thought. Feeling pleased, he thoughtfully reached for his banana and carefully poked every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent-the discouraged critters began to scurry back toward the fanstic pumpkin patch, squealing with discontent. He exhaled with relief. That's when he heard the Ferrari rolling up. It was Bakura.

-o0o-

As he pulled up, he felt a sense of urgency. He had had to make an unscheduled stop at Texaco to pick up a 12-pack of dangerous oil-soaked rags, so he knew he was running late. With a careful leap, Bakura was out of the Ferrari and went charismatically jaunting toward Yami 's front door. Meanwhile inside, Yami was panicking. Not thinking, he tossed the Winged Kuriboh into a box of dangerous oil-soaked rags and then slid the box behind his refrigerator. Yami was exasperated but at least the Winged Kuriboh was concealed. The doorbell rang.

'Come in,' Yami explosively purred. With a deft push, Bakura opened the door. 'Sorry for being late, but I was being chased by some dimwitted coke fiend in a hippie-pleasing hybrid vehicle,' he lied. 'It's fine,' Yami assured him. Bakura took a seat alarmingly close to where Yami had hidden the Winged Kuriboh. Yami belched trying unsuccessfully to hide his nervousness. 'Uhh, can I get you anything?' he blurted. But Bakura was distracted. Unaware of the bleakness of existence, Yami noticed a oafish look on Bakura's face. Bakura slowly opened his mouth to speak.

'...What's that smell?'

Yami felt a stabbing pain in his scalp when Bakura asked this. In a moment of disbelief, he realized that he had hidden the Winged Kuriboh right by his oscillating fan. 'Wh-what? I don't smell anything..!' A lie. A stupid look started to form on Bakura's face. He turned to notice a box that seemed clearly out of place. 'Th-th-those are just my grandma's wolverines from when she used to have pet South American hissing sloths. She, uh...dropped 'em by here earlier'. Bakura nodded with fake acknowledgement...then, before Yami could react, Bakura carefully lunged toward the box and opened it. The Winged Kuriboh was plainly in view.

Bakura stared at Yami for what what must've been four nanoseconds. Unaware of the bleakness of existence, Yami groped exotically in Bakura's direction, clearly desperate. Bakura grabbed the Winged Kuriboh and bolted for the door. It was locked. Yami let out a saucy chuckle. 'If only you hadn't been so protective of that thing, none of this would have happened, Bakura,' he rebuked. Yami always had been a little annoying, so Bakura knew that reconciliation was not an option; he needed to escape before Yami did something crazy, like... start chucking wolverines at him or something. With fist clenched and teeth gnashed, he gripped his Winged Kuriboh tightly and made a dash toward the window, diving headlong through the glass panels.

Yami looked on, blankly. 'What the hell? That seemed excessive. The other door was open, you know.' Silence from Bakura. 'And to think, I varnished that window frame eight days ago...it never ends!' Suddenly he felt a tinge of concern for Bakura. 'Oh. You ..okay?' Still silence. Yami walked over to the window and looked down. Bakura was gone.

-o0o-

Just yonder, Bakura was struggling to make his way through the bush behind Yami 's place. Bakura had severely hurt his double chin during the window incident, and was starting to lose strength. Another pack of feral dragons suddenly appeared, having caught wind of the Winged Kuriboh. One by one they latched on to Bakura. Already weakened from his injury, Bakura yielded to the furry onslaught and collapsed. The last thing he saw before losing consciousness was a buzzing horde of dragons running off with his Winged Kuriboh.

About five hours later, Bakura awoke, his armpit throbbing. It was dark and Bakura did not know where he was. Deep in the arid disease-infested jungle, Bakura was ridiculously lost. Ever so extemperaneously, he remembered that his Winged Kuriboh was taken by the dragons. But at that point, he was just thankful for his life. That's when, to his horror, a teensy dragon emerged from the magical cornfield. It was the alpha dragon. Bakura opened his mouth to scream but was cut short when the dragon sunk its teeth into Bakura's fingernail. With a faint groan, the life escaped from Bakura's lungs, but not before he realized that he was a failure.

Less than two miles away, Yami was entombed by anguish over the loss of the Winged Kuriboh. 'MY PRECIOUS!' he cried, as he reached for a sharpened banana. With a careful thrust, he buried it deeply into his prostate. As the room began to fade to black, he thought about Bakura... wishing he had found the courage to tell him that he loved him. But he would die alone that day. All that remained was the Winged Kuriboh that had turned them against each other, ultimately causing their demise. And as the dew on melancholy sappling branches began to reflect the dawn's reddish glare, all that could be heard was the chilling cry of distant dragons, desecrating all things sacred to virtuous men, and perpetuating an evil that would reign for centuries to come. Our heroes would've lived unhappily ever after, but they were too busy being dead. So, no one lived forever after, the end.


	7. Idolshipping

_**Here's chapter 7. It's idolshipping, or ZanexAtticus. Japanese names ARE used here. Enjoy. Yes, this is a GX pairing. There probably will be more GX pairings.**_

* * *

><p>It all started when our predictably heroic protagonist, Ryo, woke up in a lemur-infested moor. It was the fifth time it had happened. Feeling really pleased, Ryo stroked a ripened avocado, thinking it would make him feel better (but as usual, it did not). As if it really mattered he realized that his beloved iPad was missing! Immediately he called his vicariously jealous friend, Fubuki. Ryo had known Fubuki for (plus or minus) 550,000 years, the majority of which were electric ones. Fubuki was unique. He was attractive though sometimes a little... insensitive. Ryo called him anyway, for the situation was urgent.<p>

Fubuki picked up to a very angry Ryo. Fubuki calmly assured him that most disease-carrying chipmunks turn red before mating, yet Indonesian devil cats usually surreptitiously yawn after mating. He had no idea what that meant; he was only concerned with distracting Ryo. Why was Fubuki trying to distract Ryo? Because he had snuck out from Ryo's with the iPad only eight days prior. It was a flamboyant little iPad... how could he resist?

It didn't take long before Ryo got back to the subject at hand: his iPad. Fubuki belched. Relunctantly, Fubuki invited him over, assuring him they'd find the iPad. Ryo grabbed his whale and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, Fubuki realized that he was in trouble. He had to find a place to hide the iPad and he had to do it aimlessly. He figured that if Ryo took the magic flying carpet, he had take at least five minutes before Ryo would get there. But if he took the Cyber End Dragon? Then Fubuki would be abundantly screwed.

Before he could come up with any reasonable ideas, Fubuki was interrupted by three oafish tigers that were lured by his iPad. Fubuki yawned; 'Not again', he thought. Feeling relieved, he carefully reached for his live hand grenade and thoughtfully attacked every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent-the discouraged critters began to scurry back toward the secret vineyard, squealing with discontent. He exhaled with relief. That's when he heard the Cyber End Dragon rolling up. It was Ryo.

-o0o-

As he pulled up, he felt a sense of urgency. He had had to make an unscheduled stop at Egg Roll King to pick up a 12-pack of ninja stars, so he knew he was running late. With a inept leap, Ryo was out of the Cyber End Dragon and went wildly jaunting toward Fubuki 's front door. Meanwhile inside, Fubuki was panicking. Not thinking, he tossed the iPad into a box of rotten bananas and then slid the box behind his giraffe. Fubuki was worried but at least the iPad was concealed. The doorbell rang.

'Come in,' Fubuki indiscriminately purred. With a mighty push, Ryo opened the door. 'Sorry for being late, but I was being chased by some annoying zealous...zealot in a curb-jumping ghetto sled (Impala), he lied. 'It's fine,' Fubuki assured him. Ryo took a seat conveniently far from where Fubuki had hidden the iPad. Fubuki yawned trying unsuccessfully to hide his nervousness. 'Uhh, can I get you anything?' he blurted. But Ryo was distracted. As if it really mattered Fubuki noticed a oafish look on Ryo's face. Ryo slowly opened his mouth to speak.

'...What's that smell?'

Fubuki felt a stabbing pain in his double chin when Ryo asked this. In a moment of disbelief, he realized that he had hidden the iPad right by his oscillating fan. 'Wh-what? I don't smell anything..!' A lie. A clueless look started to form on Ryo's face. He turned to notice a box that seemed clearly out of place. 'Th-th-those are just my grandma's carrots from when she used to have pet albino cats. She, uh...dropped 'em by here earlier'. Ryo nodded with fake acknowledgement...then, before Fubuki could react, Ryo recklessly lunged toward the box and opened it. The iPad was plainly in view.

Ryo stared at Fubuki for what what must've been ten seconds. Suddenly cheered up by the Hamtaro theme song, Fubuki groped exotically in Ryo's direction, clearly desperate. Ryo grabbed the iPad and bolted for the door. It was locked. Fubuki let out a enticing chuckle. 'If only you hadn't been so protective of that thing, none of this would have happened, Ryo,' he rebuked. Fubuki always had been a little abrasive, so Ryo knew that reconciliation was not an option; he needed to escape before Fubuki did something crazy, like... start chucking dangerous oil-soaked rags at him or something. Duly ecstatic about the looming crises, he gripped his iPad tightly and made a dash toward the window, diving headlong through the glass panels.

Fubuki looked on, blankly. 'What the hell? That seemed excessive. The other door was open, you know.' Silence from Ryo. 'And to think, I varnished that window frame four days ago...it never ends!' Suddenly he felt a tinge of concern for Ryo. 'Oh. You ..okay?' Still silence. Fubuki walked over to the window and looked down. Ryo was gone.

-o0o-

Just yonder, Ryo was struggling to make his way through the imaginery desert behind Fubuki 's place. Ryo had severely hurt his armpit during the window incident, and was starting to lose strength. Another pack of feral tigers suddenly appeared, having caught wind of the iPad. One by one they latched on to Ryo. Already weakened from his injury, Ryo yielded to the furry onslaught and collapsed. The last thing he saw before losing consciousness was a buzzing horde of tigers running off with his iPad.

But then God came down with His attractive smile and restored Ryo's iPad. Feeling exasperated, God smote the tigers for their injustice. Then He got in His tricked out go kart and jettisoned away with the fortitude of 20 venomous koalas running from a teensy pack of disease-carrying chipmunks. Ryo ran with joy when he saw this. His iPad was safe. It was a good thing, too, because in eight minutes his favorite TV show, Keeping up with the Kardashians, was going to come on (followed immediately by 'When long-haired sea monkeys meet hand grenade'). Ryo was ecstatic. And so, everyone except Fubuki and a few bloody glove-toting albino cats lived blissfully happy, forever after.


	8. SpiritshippingGX

**Here is a very small drabble. I can't get a good plot point, so this is a tiny one.**

"Come on Jaden just a little bit longer now. You need to push a tiny bit harder." Jesse said.

"I'm trying here Jess. I really am." Jaden said. Just then another contraction hit. Jaden screamed. Jaden pushed again. "I see the head, Mr Yuki! Keep pushing." The doctor said.

Ten minutes later, Jaden was still pushing, although the baby was almost out. "Ok Jaden, one more push and he or she should be out!"

Jaden gave one hard push, and then heard the scream of a little boy crying. Jaden had given birth to a beautiful baby boy. Jaden smiled at the baby and then at Jesse before he passed out.

Jaden never woke back up.

"JADEN!" Jesse screamed, starting to cry. He looked at his newborn son, who was crying.

"Don't worry son, I'll make sure that you are taken care of." Jesse said.

"Mr. Anderson, we need a name." The nurse said.

Jesse thought, before he replied "Name him Judai."

**END.**


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